It wasn't supposed to happen. That day, when the doctor shouted, "It's a boy!"
My birthday shouldn't have been a day at all. The sun should have never broke the horizon. I wish God would just erase that day. Everyone should've slept right through it.
"12th, 13th, 15th, 16th..." Take it off the calendar. Keep that doctor quiet; don't let him shout.
Whoever wants to curse a day: Curse this one.
I wish my mother's womb never opened, then I wouldn't have to go through this.
Why didn't I die during birth? Couldn't I have been stillborn? Why was I born to a mother who cared for me? Why couldn't i just die as an infant?
If I was, I would have some peace. I would be lying next to the men and women already gone. They don't have any problems. Can't say I'm not jealous.
If I were 6 feet under, no more trouble, no more running, no more work, no more shouting.
Everyone else is under that dirt, the rich, the poor, short and tall, famous and meaningless.
Why do I have to wake up every morning to the sun shining? It only reminds me of my pain. As much as I wish for death, it doesn't come. Why is another day wasted on me? someone who has no future? God has no plan for me, this oxygen I breathe is meant for someone else.
Everything I used to be afraid might happen, could happen - it all has happened.
Not a thing goes right.
No peace, no quietness, no rest, only turmoil.
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